Dear Lonely Girl,
How are you feeling these days?
Has it been hard for you lately? Tell me what it feels like when you
close your eyes and try to fall asleep. Do you still fight it? Do you
stop breathing? I only ask because I feel for you. I worry that what
happens to me now happens to you. We share this eerie likeness, and it
hurts sometimes. But it's not all the time, at least I don't think so.
Do you worry about your future? Your entire existence? I do. I
think that every day I start to fade a little bit. And maybe people can
still see me, but I'm not as present as I used to be. Now even more
people walk into me, or rather right through me. Like I'm not even
there. Like I'm invisible--like I'm thin air. Can you imagine a world
without you in it? Don't. It will only make you feel worse.
I did this all too often and realized, life would go on, people
you think can't live without you, they will go on living. Without you.
Maybe it will be rough for a few days, or maybe even months, but they
will go on living. I'd become a faded memory, a good ol' days
reminiscence, an "if she was here I bet she'd think I was funny." But
beyond that, everyone is still moving forward. Caught up in their own
heads, their own dramas and their own stresses, and you and I have
simply ceased to exist.
Then you realize you can no longer make history. You miss the
opportunity to leave your mark because you let yourself fade, never
fighting to stay, and life left you, while every thing around you took
your place. People, things, whatever. They're still existing. But not
Are you still avoiding mirrors? Stop. I glance up at least twice a
day, to remind me that I'm me and I'm still here. Still a part of this
fight, and though I struggle with all my might and the people around me
seem to take flight, I'm still here. Lonely as it is, I'm not, really.
Cause you're right there with me. Existing, a part of this same
fight--only we haven't been formally introduced yet. It's nice to meet
Please receive this letter with an open mind and in the event
that you feel more alone than you can handle, just read it. I'll be
right there with you.
a Comrade of the Cause.